Good morning my loyal citizens
As you know I am Lulu the cat, Princess of the Somerset Levels, and you will know I have been imprisoned for some years now by two heartless humans who feel I do not have enough common sense to venture outside alone!
Of late I have found a great new trick which will soon I am sure, result in breaking the neck/necks of my captors....
The staircase here at the prison is quite steep and I have found that if they are walking down the stairs, I can run towards them very fast and cause them to slip. They appear frightened of stepping on me and lift their legs to avoid crashing into me. The result - they slip and I'm sure one day soon, will fall the length of the stairs and get the just rewards they so rightly deserve.
I have also found that when they are walking at speed through the house, running around them and across their path also causes a similar effect.
I have been sharpening my claws of late and take every opportunity to pierce their toes when they appear at the foot of their bed or out of the water in their bath. They see this as me "playing" but I know better!
I will continue my fight for freedom and will update you all soon.
HRH Princess Lulu of the Levels
